I, on the other hand, seem to be feeling quite down over the last few days and I don't really know why as Pete is fairly good. I am feeling emotionally exhausted and overwhelmed by the situation at the moment, mainly I think because of the aphasia - there have been several instances recently when I just cannot connect to what Pete is trying to say. He has been doing a bit of copying writing and we did try to get the first letters of a few words which did not go brilliantly. It breaks my heart to see him struggling so just to think of a letter, and when he can't get it he gets so sad. I feel particularly on my own as no therapists or anyone at all are coming in, although Bev will start again next week.
Another thing which worries me and hems me in is that Pete seems to feel so insecure. He needs to know where I am, what I am doing and when I will be back all the time. If I just go outside, say to get the washing in, and then meet a neighbour and start talking for 10 minutes or so he will be in a right state when I get back. Last night I had planned to go to a meeting about a local planning application and had asked Pete over the last few days if he wanted someone to come in and be with him as I had no idea how long I would be, and he said he would be ok, but when it came to it he seemed terribly worried so I couldn't go and leave him in that frame of mind. When I go to town I have to say which bus I will get back and there is no way I could miss it. Quite restricting, and at the moment, quite depressing.
Anyway, enough about me, just a quick update on Katie who I mentioned in my last blog, she is doing very well after her double lung transplant and has been on her feet, also talking within hours of the operation. As I said, an amazing young lady and such a fighter.
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